I would like to try and set up some kind of mob war/diss trading thing like those there American rappists do, but I can’t. See, the chap I want to mobwardiss, Rich, has had his blog account suspended like a dillweed. This means I can’t link to his blog to show what I’m on about, nor can we keep up some daily, weekly or monthly updates on how far our confrontation has progressed. Still, I’ll diss him even if he can’t blog respond, as I am super-cool.
See, Rich claimed the greatest joke in the history of the world is on Airplane. A fair start – immediately wrong – but fair. Then he goes on to explain why a forgettable-though-quite-funny sight gag is the funniest thing ever written. You’d get a better explanation if his site worked. It doesn’t. Still, it’s safe to say the man is deluded, and me and my homies are going to… errm… diss his ass… or something. Solely because the greatest joke ever written, or performed, or whatever else, is on Police Squad! – another Leslie Nielsen vehicle.
The setup: Frank Drebin, local supercop, takes up residence in a neighbourhood locksmith and shoe repair shop in an undercover fashion. He has been sent there to investigate a local mobster who has been shaking down businesses in the area, and so poses as a local businessman to lure in the gangsters. On rooting out who the bad guy is, Drebin finds where he is located and pays the baddie a visit. We take the scene from Drebin’s entry to the mob boss’ office:
Mob boss: “Who are you? How did you get in here?”
Drebin: “I’m a locksmith, and… I’m a locksmith.”
Repetition, wit, timing and simplicity. It’s the best joke ever performed. The ball’s in your court, Rich. HAHA YOU CAN’T REPLY AS YOUR BLOG IS BROKEN! Ahem.
Still, there is that other joke, where the woman hasn’t told him where she lives… and the “piece of cake” quip… oh, and there’s…