Why do deaf people only watch TV at 3am?

I used to have a bit of a habit, though it has fallen by the wayside in recent years: I would stay up really late and watch whatever shitty television was on until I either passed out or it was morning. Obviously this was mainly during my student years, as I can’t get away with it as much now. Though it was also during the ‘ascension period’, as I’ve just christened it, which took place between 2005-8 in Leeds, when I did very little of worth.

This being awake and watching of television introduced me to some great shows that I’ve never bothered to watch or look up since. ITV had a fine selection at around 3am each day from around 2003-4, with the likes of Craig T Nelson popping up in The District and the girl I was convinced was hot from Grounded For Life (I later realised, on a sober reappraisal, she was not – search for Lynsey Bartilson for proof) keeping me happy to be watching this garbage. Oh, and Norm on Channel 4. And some others I’ve completely forgotten about.

Anyway, that’s not what I wanted to talk about – even though I could go on about it for hours (and may well do in future). No, I wanted to chat about the fact that TV companies seem to believe that deaf and blind people only watch (or listen to, natch) TV late at night and very early in the morning. Aside from a few exceptions, like the Hollyoaks omnibus at weekends, you only see the little signing prick or hear audio descriptions of the action from the hours of midnight onwards.

I never did understand this: it seems the execs believe those less fortunate than the able-eared and able-eyed out there are also so pathetic they don’t even have a reason to go to bed, and so obviously stay up all night, every night, watching/listening to shitty TV. That’s the only explanation, as surely otherwise they would offer an option for signing or audio descriptions during the day*, but no. They expect every hearing and sight-impaired person in the world to only watch TV during the hours of midnight to about 5am, and they only offer them garbage like Grounded For (sodding) Life. Sick, sick bastards.

What this also means is that TV exec types equated the blind and deaf to myself as a student. I don’t know if this is a compliment or not.

*Subtitles and an option for audio descriptions exist on digiboxes, I know. Be quiet, I’m being satirical (read: wrong).

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1 Comment

Filed under Prattle

One response to “Why do deaf people only watch TV at 3am?

  1. becks

    Ian your amazing …..never fail to brighten my day with your outlook an all things random.

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