This was the last year for Big Brother, that TV thing that started off as quite an interesting idea and soon devolved into the maniacal wank-fest that it was over the last few years. I’ve managed to get through this year without seeing a single second of the godawful thing, which makes me very happy, and very proud.
What the fuck do you mean it’s still going on? Ultimate what what? Oh god.
So it would appear, as it’s the last series eveerrrr (it’ll be back in less than five years, I reckon) Channel 4 are pulling out all the stops to keep people watching. First of all by extending it for however long they’re extending it for (I don’t know how long this is, and I’m not checking. Screw you), then by bringing in John McCricirkckkiriskckzzk.
Well blow me down, if that isn’t just the perfect recipe for a slice of delicious TV Pie I Want To Watch (And Eat). Ohnowait. It’s exactly the kind of thing that makes me glad I rarely bother with TV, as I would likely rather have a limb chopped off than watch that utter gash.
I can’t take some arrogant high road though, as I have indeed watched a bit of Big Brother in my past. I watched the series with Kate thingy in it, I caught the latter part of the series where that horrible fat thing put a bottle up herself and I saw it the other year – mainly because I was forced by the Evil Taskmasters at hecklerspray to write about it. The series with that ginger twat in it, whose name I’ve forgotten.
Anyway, there’s no payoff here. I don’t like Big Brother, I’m not really shocked it’s still going on, I’m not going to watch it. Revelatiooooooon.