After watching the film entitled ‘Hall Pass’ last night, I can safely say that the film entitled ‘Hall Pass’ is one of the worst things I have ever seen in my life. Two things, over the course of around one hour and 50 minutes, two things actually made me laugh – and that’s because one was a dick joke, one was a shit joke.
I’m always going to laugh at dick and shit jokes, no matter how unfunny everything else around them is.
Owen Wilson plays Owen fucking Wilson, again, like he does in every bloody film ever with his weird bent face and inability to come across as anything other than Owen cocking Wilson. Then there’s that bloke from the Hangover, who plays a dickhead or something – I don’t know, I wasn’t really listening.
Basically it’s a story about two horrible men with wives who are almost as bad as they are and how they go on exciting adventures and realise OH MY GOD THEY LOVE EACH OTHER regardless of the fact that at the beginning of the film they hate each other. The husbands and wives, that is, because men cannot love each other. Jesus said so.
Allegedly there are some jokes inbetween. I didn’t pick up on any, bar the two mentioned. All I saw was almost two hours of the most execrable characters in a film I have ever seen. I did not care for any of them, I did not like any of them, I did not want any of them to succeed or flourish in any way. I wanted them to piss off.
But for some reason I watched it all. Still, Pepper from Neighbours gets her norks out, so it’s the best film ever made.