Today a hero of mine died in a ridiculous, shit way that really isn’t, but then is, befitting of him. Yes, professional Jackass Ryan Dunn (and former CKYer, as well as wonderful lead character in one of the best drinking films ever made, Haggard) has only gone and got himself killed.
Details are a bit all over the place right now, but my SOURCES are telling me he was driving his Porsche at 110mph, quite possibly under the influence of booze. Now, if true, this is the behaviour of a dickhead and is seriously irritating. Like when you find out people you like as musicians didn’t die in (non-alcohol-influenced) car crashes, but had heroin overdoses. BRADLEY.
Anyway, yes, away from the ‘why that was a fucking stupid way to die’ and toward the ‘I like the bearded idiot because’.
He had a brilliant beard. Like, really brilliant. The kind of beard I genuinely wish I could grow, but I cannot. Nor will I ever be able to. This saddens me more than you could ever know. Even more than the death of the man.
But aside from the beard, he just seemed like the best one of the Jackass bunch. Bam is a spoilt little shit, Steve-O a moron, Pontius even worse, Knoxville is great but wasn’t there from the start and… the miscellaneous ones were just miscellaneous.
Dunn appeared to be the one who would throw you through a wall just to make everyone laugh, but would then at least make a cursory effort to make sure you were okay. Then throw himself through a wall. With that beard.
Plus the one where he’s sat outside at a bar and says he’ll get run over by the next car that goes past – then does – ranks up there as one of my favourite things I’ve ever seen.
I need to do a post explaining why Jackass (and to a lesser extent CKY) is one of the best things ever at some point. Just so you idiots all learn to appreciate.
Anyway, while he appears to have gone out in one of the worst, most idiotic and shit ways you could possibly ever think, I’m still sad to see the bearded twerp gone.
And why not finish with this, because it’s a bit weird in the current context: