No, that’s a lie

Today I found out my dearest friend had died in a hot air balloon jousting contest…

No, that’s a lie. I just can’t think of anything to write about. What would be the best way to die – not just your usual, blaze of glory (taking everyone else down with you) schtick, but for you personally.

See, I’m a handsome, rakish rogue that confounds as much as he delights the general populace…

No, that’s a lie. I just can’t think of anything to write about myself. What would be the best way to write about yourself – not just your usual, I am a person (taking everyone else down with you) schtick, but you personally.

See, I tend to write using words that you mere humanoids will do nothing but fail to understand…

No, that’s a lie. I just can’t think of anything to write about writing. What would be the best way to write about writing – not just your usual, this is some well good words (taking everyone else down with you) schtick, but your words personally.

See, I realise this is making very little sense right now but it was completely planned like this from the beginning…

No, that’s a lie. I just can’t think of anything to write about.

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