Help for the hindering

Let’s give a shout out to those people who never get shouted out to – those that go through life sort of expecting thanks, but never really getting it. The people that you try to ignore and forget about, but they stick there in your mind, annoying you to your very core every time they pop back up again. I’m talking, of course, about people who try and help when there’s no need for them to try and help.

I still get infuriated every time I remember the guy who stepped in after I’d been trying to make an epileptic man not crack his skull open on the pavement for 10 minutes. “I’m my office first-aider,” he said, “give him some space – don’t pin him down”. Well, fat boy – I wasn’t pinning him down. I am not a moron. He needed something to cushion the repeating bashing of his head on concrete, that being my hand. Hence the not giving him space thing.

He thought he was helping, he thought he was being the big man on campus. He was not. So I’d like to send out my massive thanks to that particular pile of idiotic poop. The best of intentions don’t make up for the fact you’re a moron, mate. And if you’re the work first-aider, the minute something bad happens it’s clearly going to be 9/11 Part II: 9/11 In Space.

Alright, so I’m failing to think of many more examples beyond the usual meddling old women who seem to be everywhere in Bournemouth. But you get the point. If you’re going to help, please actually help. Don’t just be an obstacle that thinks it’s helping things flow smoothly, you gimps.

No idea where this came from. Hmm.


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