The future is an angry place, potentially

Apparently, according to this that I just gone done read, the future of gaming (and computers in general) will see software that can read and register your emotional state. It can then react accordingly – maybe a game will make a character talk to you differently, or the system will automatically play music to suit, or change, your mood, or maybe it will offer to talk to you OH ROBO-COMPANIONSHIP WHY AREN’T YOU HERE NOW?

Ahem.

But I fear this future (it will recognise my fear). Not because I’m a fuddy duddy Luddite from ah-ha-ha the past, but for one very good reason: when I am sat in front of my games console, TV, a movie screen, my computer or whatever else I only ever experience two emotions: angry and angrier (and sometimes hungry. Is that an emotion? What about fire, is that an emotion?*).

The system wouldn’t even have to be complex to deal with my technological-viewing states, meaning I would feel it to be a bit of a waste of money and scientific endeavour. On the other side, the computer would probably end up confused – if it’s been programmed to get confused – and not know why it could never please me with anything it does.

Poor potential future computer – it’s not your fault. The problem lies with the fact I am an angry and hateful young (old) man. I shout at videogames because they are SHIT and WRONG. I shout at the computer because it is SHIT and WRONG. I shout at TV because it sometimes has David Cameron on it so it is therefore SHIT and WRONG. I am angry and angrier, in general, because things are SHIT and WRONG.

So this future-tech isn’t the way we should go. Not because it won’t work, or scares me, or might take over the world or anything like that. No, we shouldn’t go this way because I don’t want to risk confusing, upsetting or alienating a hypothetical computer.

I think I need to go to bed, on that note.

*Ah, stealing from Eugene Mirman. You’ll know him as the landlord in Flight Of The Conchords. Look him up, he amuses me.

2 Comments

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2 responses to “The future is an angry place, potentially

  1. Dan

    I still remember reading about the ps2 and dual shock 2 controllers, and how the pressure sensors in the pad would be able to detect when you were finding a game hard, and make it easier for you. Did that ever happen, playstation boy?

  2. Of course not. It was just more of the EMOTION ENGINE bullshit.

    Buttons are pressure-sensitive, though. They’re not always used in that way though, which is annoying.

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