New massive dogs wot I dun want

I no longer want an Irish Wolf Hound. Why would I want a dog made to kill wolves when I could get one made to kill bears?

Thanks to Reddit, obviously, I have learned of the existence of two brilliant-looking breeds of dog today and I must have them both. First up, though in second place on the I Want list, is the Tibetan Mastiff.

Now, I wanted an English Mastiff, but look at these buggers. They’re clearly amazing and were created to be owned by me, even if they are about 10 times bigger than me. I mean, I wouldn’t want to clean up their dumps, but there you go.

And it would make people stay the fuck away from my shit, yo.


But top of the new I Want That Dog list is the Caucasian Shepherd Dog. Just… yeah. It used to be used to hunt bears. HUNT BEARS. Mainly because to kill a bear you should fight it with something that might as well be a bear.


Not that I have anything against bears. In fact, I kind of want a bear too. Though I’m not sure if the bear would be able to live with Clive the bear-hunting dog.

Suppose there’s only one way to find out, really. I’ll just not bother telling my landlord – it’ll be easy to hide two dogs that are bigger than me and a bear. EASY.


1 Comment

Filed under Prattle

One response to “New massive dogs wot I dun want

  1. get a Caucasian shepherd. its tongue is the size of your head.

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