Privacy is for paedos

Paul McMullan is my new favourite person. Not because he’s actually good in any way, but because he’s the greatest creation Armando Iannucci and Chris Morris have never come up with.

Privacy is for paedos.

Privacy is for paedos.

Privacy is for paedos.

To be a truly incredibly person, you have to come out with incredible statements like that. You want to use a changing room to hide your modesty? PAEDO.

Close the door when you take a shit? PAEDO.

Hide your status updates from anybody, ever, at all, on FaceboYOUAREAPAEDO.

Ask for privacy from the media in the immediate aftermath of a loved one’s death? YOU FUCK KIDS BECAUSE YOU ARE INTENSELY SEXUALLY AROUSED BY THE LITTLE BASTARDS.

It’s devastatingly logical logic.

I have to laugh. I have to. I have to find something funny from today, because the government is doing its level best to make me go on a bona-fide killing spree by bending the country over and fucking it with a rusty bayonet. It’s good to know that the government genuinely, actually does not care about you at all.

I mean, I knew it – I’ve always known it. But this is such a brazen, blatant show of this fact in a very public situation, it’s hard not to be at least a little surprised. You are an ant. You do not matter. Fuck you.

On a related note that isn’t related at all: I have started using smilies in things I’m writing. And you know what? I don’t hate it. It makes it easier than having to explain in detail why I’m joking or being sarcastic. Plus I can make any sentence sexy by doing this 😉

WINKING SMILEY FACE.

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