Monthly Archives: November 2011

Admit you’re wrong, prannocks

I don’t really get that annoyed with internet people, at least not beyond the initial Furious Blast that often comes out of me. To be fair, the Furious Blast comes for a lot of reasons so it’s not like it’s out of the ordinary. It happens though, and it happens because people say stupid things. But I get over that – I move on.

But one thing I find hard to get over, ignore or not be a prissy little bitch about is the fact people will go out of their way to not acknowledge when they are wrong. To not accept when they have been proven wrong. To not simply say something like “ah, sorry, my mistake” and move on.

I try and do this every time I’m demonstrably proven wrong. I don’t live by particularly different rules online to those offline – if I’m wrong, I’ll admit it. Accept it. Move on, more learned as a result. Be a fucking real person.

It’s a petty little thing and it really doesn’t actually matter, but it has irked me today, in recent weeks, in recent months, basically since the internet was invented by Al Gore*. If you are hit in the face with a fact bomb and it proves your argument absolutely wrong, it proves what you were saying was entirely false, please just at least acknowledge that.

Because otherwise I get a little bit pissy, and we can’t be having one unimportant schmo in the world being slightly miffed about something now, can we?

*Almost literally true.

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Taking away habits

I just realised I’ve ordered takeaway on a weekday for the first time in… well, possibly this year. That, for me, is a pretty big thing as I was always one to find any excuse to order dodgy, overpriced food using the internet (because I don’t want to have to talk to people) on any day of the week.

T’would appear that whole thing about forgetting about things, or getting out of the habit does indeed ring true. T’would also appear it was easier than I expected it to be to get out of said habit – the only thing I needed to do was not do it.

Can’t preach, anyway, as I’ve given in and ordered a pizza. Shut up, I’m hungry and a diet of rice and beans is annoying me. I have a spare tenner from not going out this weekend (yes, that logic works) and I wanted to see if this new pizza place is anything like as good as Pitza Cano.

It won’t be. It won’t be.

Still, I can hope. And now I play the waiting game. And I drink tea. And I wonder if I should play Udraw Something Something Whatever It’s Called for a bit. And I run out of vaguely pointed things to say in this blog.

And so I stop writing.

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Forgotten fantasy (football)

I don’t remember if I’ve gone on about this before, but my opting out of the fantasy Premier League this season has been one of my better decisions. While before I would agonise for whole minutes about my choice of (third-choice) striker for the week, now I can just sit back and wait for Gary Lineker to tell me what’s happened without really caring about the majority of the results or what’s actually happened.

Gary and his weird beard thing, I should say.

Before I would worry about if Lampard had got the assist for a Terry goal. I would care that Charlie Adam did well. I would laugh at those foolish enough to put Torres in their side just because he’s pricey. I would will things to happen that wouldn’t actually suit me on a personal level, just because they would result in more points for my players.

They can win still, but I need the other team to score one and it to be a penalty from so-and-so. As long as he doesn’t get booked I can take the points hit from the keeper conceding and if the assist goes to… god it’s boring and annoying.

Not that I don’t enjoy it. I just couldn’t be bothered this time around. It takes the fun out of just being a mindless watcher of the game, rather than someone actively involved in every pissing thing that happens.

Also I got bored of finishing around fifth every season. There’s that too.

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COME ON

Arrested Development is now officially, actually coming back. It’s been known for a while now, but the story’s been featured on the BBC and as we all know nothing is true until the BBC talks about it. Which is why my overall knowledge is lacking in certain areas. Areas the BBC doesn’t talk about. Like how popular hammocks are in the West Indies.

Sort it out BBC – I need my knowledge.

Anyway, this is not a cheap trick (illusion), though it did require an intervention where fans of the show wrote about it constantly while shouting “CHECK OUT BANNER, FOX!” until they got the message. And now it’s coming back.

And I’m happy.

Normally I’d be worried, because nothing that comes back is ever as good as before. But then I remember this week when I realised that new Futurama is just as good as old Futurama, meaning that entire logic bomb is a dud, has not detonated, is incorrect (bomb). Arrested Development can come back and can be as good as it was before.

It will be as good as it was before.

There’s a definite end in sight this time, there’s no desperation on the part of anyone to keep it going beyond the series and movie – they know how much they have to work with, they know what they can do in that time. There’s no rush, there’s no need to please network execubots, there’s no need to pander. They can just get on with it.

As such, I think it’ll be a resounding success. I might be wrong though, and there’s every chance I’m drunk right now.

(I’m not drunk, it just seems like I am because of all this positivity)

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Surprise, surprise

Surprises are great, aren’t they? I know people who don’t like them, even when it’s expressly stated that they will be a Good and Pleasant surprise of the Great variety. I still try my damndest to avoid the football scores at the weekend so I can be surprised by them on Match Of The Day.

I’m aware I shouldn’t post this while MOTD is still on, because someone will ruin the Everton score for me. BAD SURPRISE.

But surprises are good. Mystery is good. Not knowing and having something pop up unexpectedly is good.

Like, say, if someone was to get me this and randomly send it to me without telling me about it I would be quite happy. Because surprises are great, especially when they mean I get something out of it. Especially when that something is a coffee machine with ‘keen intelligence’ (it’s Skynet).

Granted, there are such things as bad surprises, but that’s not the point I’m making. The point I’m making is that I want that coffee machine so someone needs to buy it for me before I kill you all.

Also I’m nearly out of milk. No intelligent coffee machine, barely any milk. This is the worst life ever.

And the coffee machine is out of stock. Goddddd. BAD SURPRISE.

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TP for my bunnnnghole

It’s good to be reminded that sometimes – sometimes – Vice is a good magazine. I mean, it was always better than a lot of other shit I would read (not buy – read) at uni, like the NME (read I did not buy the NME read read read and even then I didn’t read it properly god I hate the NME). But it dallied with wankerishness far too much for me to ever really get on board.

But now they gone done put Beavis and Butthead on the front cover and have a pretty good interview with Mike Judge in the mag. This makes me happy, as I like Beavis and Butthead and I like Mike Judge, even if Idiocracy wasn’t as good as it should have been. Still a fine idea on paper, though.

He’s a man who nails the ‘normal’ person thing quite well – he seems to get and appreciate the fact that inanity and boredom is a huge part of everyday life. While his output tends to be something of a rallying cry against accepting your lot, like in Office Space, or stupidity in general, like B&B or Idiocracy (and to some extent King of the Hill), there’s never anything in what he makes that makes you, the viewer, feel like a worse person if you do accept your lot or you are stupid.

I have no idea what I’m on about anyway, I’m stupid and accept my lot. I love Office Space. I’m just going to put some Youtube clips here because I don’t know what else to write for this, which just be glad I didn’t write yesterday while drunk.

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Na na na na na wasting your time, like how that Green Day song goes

How many of you waste holiday? As in, time off work. What do you waste it on? I really want to know this, as I am considering booking time off work in order to waste it effectively. My choices of how to waste it are limited to a few options, which I will list… in a bit. Maybe now.

No, not now. First I talk a bit about something else, like holiday. I haven’t taken it as regularly as I did last year, but I have taken it in big chunks. Damn Things To Do Around The World. I do, however, want to go back to Amsterdam, because Amstergoddamn that place was good. Also Groezrock, but not camping – in an RV YES I SAID RV. Anyway, I promised a list and I know you’re all on the edge of your collective seat.

So I’m not going to do a list just yet. Nah, I’ll talk about something else else for a bit. I haven’t even bothered with a long weekend in an age. I should probably do that. An extra few hours of sleep in a Friday morning is something I could do with. He says on a Thursday afternoon when he doesn’t have tomorrow off work. Damn it. LIST TIME! What I could waste my time on with time off:

  • Play videogames.
  • Read the (easy) books I ordered today.
  • Play more videogames.
  • Come up with longer lists of things to waste my time off work on.

That’s about it, really. Suggestions welcome. Like ‘making a fucking epic sandwich’, or something.

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