It’s almost as if trains go out of their way to piss me off and make me moan here. I mean, this has to be about the four billionth blog I’ve done specifically about trains and Why They Are Shit. Still, it doesn’t get old and I know you all enjoy it loads and if you do think it gets old and you don’t enjoy it loads then shut up I know you’re lying.
So yesterday I was meant to get up and to catch my booked train for half 11 in the am. As I emerged from bed at 4.30pm, I was under the impression I might have missed my trains. Turns out I had – who knew? It was all fine though, through the miracle of ‘having a proper ticket for once’ it meant I could just get another train.
Simple, yeah? Yeah. Thanks, trains.
I had to get four of them, it took me about eight hours to get home and not a single one of them was on time, for one reason or another. I was on time for every one of them – apart from one, which was down to a train I was on being delayed half an hour and… oh, this isn’t funny or illuminating. It’s just straightforward complaining.
I don’t think I’ve felt sadder in recent times than yesterday, standing in a dank corner out of the way in Birmingham New Street, slowly chewing on a disgusting sandwich and avoiding drunken football fans while listening to the constant announcements of “could any members of the British Transport Police please make their way to platform X”. And that’s saying something, what with the reason I was home was for a funeral.
Travelling can be fucking shit, truth be told. It’s almost as if the train companies go out of their way to make it as shit as possible when you’re just wanting it to be as easy as possible.