The grand guitar plan, part II

After attending a certain punk rock music festival this weekend (dedicated post(s) upcoming), I have decided to pick up the lump of wood one more time and give it a thwacking like never before and oh god this has turned into a horrible euphemism.

I am going to ‘go guitar’ again.

But this time, unlike when I was about 15, it won’t be because I genuinely want to learn and want to be able to play songs like the ones I love(d) so much. It won’t be because I have friends willing to put in the time and effort to teach me like I had all those years ago. It won’t be because I was taught the riff to Party Hard, or because there’s a recording of me singing the Foo Fighters’ Big Me somewhere out there (“really well,” apparently). It won’t even be to get girls.

It will be for the money.

We learned someone at the festival was paid money to play a 30-minute acoustic set. One man, one guitar, that’s all he had to bring. Oh, and some songs and the ability to play and sing them. Minor stuff, really. And what was he paid?

€500.

So as you can probably see, this is the way to a fucking goldmine. Imagine – two gigs a month and I’d be on… umm… hmm…

Wait a sec… carry the nine…

€1,002!

Minus two, I think.

I will be rich, and it will all be down to my awesome guitar playing. Now can someone loan me money to buy a left-handed acoustic? Cheers. I’ll turn all my blog entries into songs. It’s a plan that will not fail and will be easy to do.

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