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Late entry to the drunkicon

This counts, because I’ve not been to bed since I woke up. THEREFORE it’s just one day. Good god It’s hard to hit the keys I want.

There are many different types of drunken people, and they all react to the DEVIL’S BREW in different ways. I, for example, tend to stand tall and stoic, looking like no one can fell this giant when in actual fact all you need to do is sing some ABBA at me and I’m on the floor. It’s a fine technique that I’ve honed over the years and it results in many friends saying things like “I didn’t even know you were drunk” and the like. Trust me – I was.

Then we have the foolish drunks, who get a few bevvies inside them and let just about everything loose. Sorry kids, but just keep some of it for the imagination, instead of just being a big drunk prick who gets naked at the first sign of half a pint of shandy. Not naming any names.

Can you tell this is down the path of naming drunk types? It’s easy to do this bit when I’ve had a few shandies myself.

My favourite is probably the all-outer, who drinks so much they can no longer see, communicate or… well – live. These tend to be the ones that are either lightweights or overdrinkers (a phrase I’ve just invented, yet one I’m sure has been used before). They are the most amusing of the drinkers, and the ones that make us continue to try and destroy our most hardy of the organs – the liver.

Apologies both for the fact this is a shit entry, and the fact I’m so very inebriated right now. All spelling mistakes/typos are courtesy of BEER. I love you all. Good night.

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