I think it’s finally happened – I’m all ranted out. At least for today.
Whereas in a normal day I will have at least one rant, on average 12, today I had at least 12 rants, probably more like 43. Nothing I was ranting about actually mattered, obviously, but then if what I was ranting actually mattered it would probably make me very sad, rather than just angrier and angrier.
Whether it be people having the Wrong Opinion, people having the Wrong Opinion or people having the Wrong Opinion, there seemed to be plenty to get het up about today. I was especially narky at the person who had the Wrong Opinion.
The Wrong Opinioned idiot.
Fortunately I am not one to hold grudges, apart from against people who deserve them (you know who you are, and you probably don’t read this so I can probably call you what I want and you’d never know oh the feeling of power that’s just washed over me is incredible… but I won’t because I’m nice).
What this means is that while tomorrow people will still be walking around having had the Wrong Opinion at me today, I’m willing to let them start again and re-Wrong at me tomorrow. This allows a fresh rant and to keep relationships both spicy and interesting.
I might even have a minor rant about the Gervais/mong thing tomorrow. Bet you and the millions of other readers of this very important blog can’t wait!
So who are you going to vote for then? I’m writing this with about half an hour of the final political debate, after having watched all of them and almost paid attention in-between Tweeting comedy gold. So it’s safe to say I’m the most politically-educated person alive today. Fact. What have we learned from these debates? Well, that the initial novelty does soon wear off. It was surprising and interesting to see these three leaders stand up, live on telly and talk about the issues that apparently matter. Initially, at least.
The second time around it became a bit old, with the three same blokes expressing the three same viewpoints on pretty similar points again. Third time around, it’s just out and out boring. We need more swearing, we need genuine anger, tears, fists flying and cries of “BIGOT!” whenever possible.
We don’t need Cameron saying “change” in under five seconds of his opening speech (as timed by John Prescott on Twitter), we don’t need Gordon Brown’s ‘switched off robot’ face every time he takes a breath, and we don’t need Clegg playing the “I’m so different to these two” card. Though, admittedly, most of all we need less David Cameron on TV. Forever. Horrible-faced man, very much needs a jab in the balls. If he has any.
Anyway, I’ve given up on it and moved to the football. Politics went from interesting to quite hopeful and back to dull samey shite over the space of three weeks. Oh well. It has actually affected my vote.