Tag Archives: DREAMS

Dreams can(‘t) come true

I am often regaled with stories of dreams by others. In the past I was very much of the Dennis from Sunny mentality, in that if it doesn’t involve me and nobody’s having sex, I don’t care. But then, in recent years, I’ve sort of stopped remembering my dreams. Apart from the odd one here and there, maybe once a month or every two months, when I’ll have a really vivid dream, and angry one or a sad one usually. Then I remember. Usually though, I do not.

And since that’s been the case, I’ve found myself not hating hearing about the dreams of others. In fact, there’s almost some comfort in them telling me what inanity/insanity has gone through their subconscious the night before.

Naturally it’s always better if I’m in it or someone’s having sex, but I can stand to hear “and then I walked through the threshold BUT IT WAS A CAVE! Also I was a Jedi” and not want to vomit blood directly into the nasal passages of whoever it is regaling me with said coma-recollection.

I don’t want to guess why I’ve changed, but my C at GCSE psychology qualifies me to do so. So I will. I think I just miss dreaming, or at least remembering them. The dreams I do remember I don’t like – which is why I remember them, I suppose. It’s comforting to hear the daftness that comes out of the minds of others that they remember, and it gives me hope that one day I will start remembering the rubbish ones. Not just the ones where I literally wake up shaking with anger and spend the rest of the day in a genuinely bad mood because of something my brain has made up.

And yeah, brain – stop dreaming about the dog please. She died eight years ago. Stop trying to pretend she’s still alive, thus making me wake up unhappy. You fucking cunt.

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I’m a dreamer

Has watching anything, or playing a game or reading a book or anything like that ever given you nightmares? I don’t mean watching your loved ones die in a horrible, gory explosion right in front of your face – that’s going to give you some fucked up dreams, no doubt. I just mean something ostensibly made for entertainment – has it ever got in your head to the point you have woken up in a cold sweat?

It’s a common thing for people to say ‘it’ll give me nightmares’, but what I’ve found is that it’s the anticipation that’s worse, then the way your mind plays tricks on you – especially when tired, drunk, hungover or otherwise in a less-than-perky condition. Nightmares? No.

Except for once. Night Breed. The Amiga. I was six years old. There was a section in the game where you had to run away from snake-hair man in a graveyard by tapping the mouse buttons as fast as you could. If you didn’t taptaptap fast enough, he caught you and bit you in a delightfully bloody fashion.

So naturally you want to taptaptap fast enough, right? Well, no. See, if you get away the police would corner you and shoot you dead.

You couldn’t win. You literally couldn’t escape. I mean, that was the point – I think you were meant to be bitten so you could be infected and blah de blah. But I was six, for eff’s sake. I gave up when I realised I’d die no matter what I did. Then I had a bad dream about it.

But other than that slight misstep I’ve never had a bad dream as a result of a film, TV show, game, book, comic, musical, stage show, street performance, dance troupe, contemporary artfag play – nothing.

I still see Martians from the corner of my eye, peering at me through the doorway in my room whenever I watch War Of The Worlds though. I’m both awake and 28. This shit shouldn’t scare me anymore.

Now nightmares about real things – oh those I can tell you some stories about. Those are the things that never fucking stop. Sigh.

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Dreams: can come true

It’s taken until today (27 years, 11 months, 13 days) for the dream to become a reality, but it has finally happened. The boyhood dreams I had – the conversations with friends about how brilliant it would be, the plans we made on how we would make it happen ourselves, the tools we chose to take with us into this particular battle all ended up being unnecessary.

Plus I don’t actually have any contact with the people I made these plans with, seeing as I was about eight years old at the time. And to be fair, none of us could be bothered forking out the cash required to do it, plus – because we were about eight years old – we couldn’t afford much more than a can of coke and a Chomp each. So there’s that.

Anyway: today I played a videogame on a cinema screen. If you have any interest in gaming or have ever played a game, the thought of what it would be like to play a game on a however-many metre wide screen will have entered your head at some point. For me it was during childhood – we wanted to play Street Fighter II on a screen big enough to make the characters life-size. I don’t know why I specifically remember this, but I do.

Probably something to do with Chun-Li’s thighs. Rawr.

Anyway, that’s one to tick off the to-do list. Yes, I had something that wasn’t ‘do a flaming bungee jump off the top of an exploding building on a quad bike while surfing and having four sharks thrown at me’ on my to-do list. Sorry I’m not so fucking cool as you. But you may well have trekked across entire deserts on nothing more than a single bottle of water and a camel called Horace, you may have made incredible discoveries like that the brontosaurus is thin at one end, gets fatter in the middle, then thins out at the other end and you might have got yourself the job as King (OR QUEEN) Of All by the time you were 12, but you know what?

You haven’t played a game on a cinema screen.

Unless you have, in which case shut up and leave me be.

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