I often want to insult people in ways beyond just calling them a ‘fucking prick’, for two very good reasons. First up, it makes things more interesting and unexpected in the insult stakes. Secondly, it means when I do resort to the simple, straightforward ‘fucking prick’ insult-alikes, they feel a bit fresher and more potent coming from me.
As such, I am always on the lookout for new things to be calling those who wrong me in whatever way (there are lots of ways to wrong me). I don’t always remember them though, and sometimes the sheer power of the feelings of hatred I have for the person (or inanimate object) at the time dulls out all rational, creative thinking and I am left merely resorting to calling them a time-tested thing. Like a ‘fucking prick’.
So I’m going to note down a few words I want to try and remember to call people; words that can enter the list of oft-employed insults I throw around these days like ‘vagabond’, ‘whelp’, ‘swine’ and ‘rotter’.
Cur, because, like, it’s a great word and it brings to mind swashbuckling. I think.
Wart, because, well, warts are disgusting aren’t they so it would be saying the person is disgusting. Yeah?
Stain. I just like the concept of calling someone a stain. It amuses me.
Bereftwat, which is something I just this second invented. It indicates someone is bereft of thought and a twat. Something like that, at least.
Breeder, a common insult thrown around by certain types, and one I want to get into my personal lexicon. It’s just so idiotic and condescending, I love it.
Methusai, because it’s an ancient Greek insult and who doesn’t want to use ancient Greek insults? (It means ‘old woman/hag’ and is especially insulting when used against men, apparently)
I think that will do for now. My head can only hold so many words at a… I’ve forgotten the word. You fucking prick.