I’ve just seen this linked on Twitter and it’s one of the most painfully unfunny, embarrassing pieces of crap I’ve ever seen. Apart from the first image, which is brilliant.
Instead of doing the usual internet thing of slagging off from afar and leaving it at that, I’ve decided – graciously and forgoing all pay – to come up with a few, better, videogame-related jokes.
No apologies if you have no grounding in gaming. I probably don’t like you if you don’t anyway. YOU POOR FOOLS.
-Why did Master Chief cross the road?
To get away from the unimaginative tossers who named him!
-Which is the best civilization?
Who is there?
Joy of whom?
Joy pad! (CAN BE INTERCHANGED WITH ‘STICK’)
-Why did Frank Welker almost opt out of his Bogus Journey?
Because they almost didn’t let him Play Station!
-What did the geek say to the dork?
Dweeb off, nerd!
I think that suitably brings the quality of jokes about gaming on the internet up by about 4,300%. You can thank me later, mainly with money.
I think I’ve figured out part of the reason why I play videogames: it’s my job. Oh, I also thought of another, less obvious reason too, which I might elaborate on now. Not sure. Maybe. Oh, go on then. A bit of back story to this wild and wacky tale, though.
This week has seen the Electronic Entertainment Expo (E3) in Los Angeles, where all manner of new, shiny and exciting videogames are revealed to the world. Throughout history (since 1995) it’s been a source of wonderment to me: new properties are revealed, consoles we’d never thought possible are revealed and there are lots of “sexy” “ladies” standing around in skimpy costumes sure to make their parents proud.
Now, as a young ‘un – and especially before the internet existed in my life – E3 was the best thing ever. It was like Christmas, except with less disappointment. Though you didn’t get any Lego. New this, new that, surprise here, surprise there. As things progressed it still stayed high on my radar, as the surprises still came – the ‘megatons’ still flew. I expected this year’s event to bore me, as seeing as I now work in the industry I am privy to insider knowledge, and as such thought I knew everything that was to be announced at the show.
Fortunately for my tiny child brain, I was wrong. There was a surprise (the Portal 2 announcement) that genuinely made me very happy, made me feel like a giddy child again. And this is why I love videogames – why I still play them regularly. They always remind me of that sense of childlike wonder you can have with the world, and it’s something I see more and more people losing as they get older.
I’m still a cynical bastard, mind you.