Pork? How dare you!

Today I would like to put a vat of meat and tomato and stuff in a pan and have it cook for hours before feasting on it. I would like this because I saw it on Saturday Kitchen and it made me want it and I was eating toast and I like toast but toast is boring and is not slow-cooked meat.

Unfortunately I have hot plates and not a proper cooking setup, so the ability to blast foodstuffs with what would be considered ‘controlled’ heat is limited at best. As such I tend to stick to simpler, boring..er things that I don’t mind so much if I mess up.

Yes, that’s my new excuse for not cooking anything interesting or proper ever. Beyond rice and vegetables. So much rice and vegetables. Brown rice, mushrooms, lentils, cook a while, throw in some broccoli, kidney and butter beans, cook a while longer, drain, throw in some tinned tomato, salt, pepper, chilli flakes, keep on the heat a bit longer, serve, eat, be annoyed because it’s actually quite nice but you are bored of eating it almost every day but hey it’s not exactly bad for you, it is easy to make and it’s damn cheap to live off, maybe you should treat yourself to a steak today, why should you treat yourself it’s not like you’ve earned it, don’t you remember you sat in all night on a Friday doing loads of work to get it out of the way last night and you tidied your flat to the best of your ability (not very well) so you probably do deserve something maybe just a tin of beans though, but beans aren’t a treat they’re a necessity, what are you talking about, I don’t know, stop this now, okay, are you glad there’s only six blogs left to do after this one, yes I am because they’re turning into exercises in space filling in a far more obvious way than they’ve ever been before, what about pork ribs, huh, I said what about pork ribs, you mean spare ribs, yeah whatever, I like them why, because you should go and get some and play about with them see if you can make anything delicious, but I can’t be bothered, oh go on they’re cheap you like them and it’s meat just stop being a little bitch and go to Waitrose and try to blend in with the middle class old women like you usually do, oh alright then.


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